Sex therapist Juliane Maxwald in New York agreed. “Someone can have had many partners and still rely on the same sexual routines, while someone with less experience may be curious, attentive and willing to learn,” she explained.
Being a good lover has as much to do with sexual self-knowledge as it does with experience — understanding your own interests, desires, boundaries, and what gives you pleasure, while remaining curious about your partner’s.”
What advice do you have for late bloomers around having sex? Are there ways to gain experience that will ease the transition?
There’s plenty you can do to build sexual confidence, but having a lot of casual sex isn’t on the list, particularly if you push yourself into situations you’re not comfortable with. Instead, focus on learning what brings you pleasure. That’s something you don’t need a partner to learn, Duquette said.
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